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I woke up this morning to an empty left side of the bed. I assumed he was on the couch, he was not. I am sure that he had a few beers at Stephens and just crashed there, I am sure that they just stayed up entirely to late playing x-box, I am sure that all he did last night was kill vertual zombies with his guard buddy, I am sure.
But my mind still wanders and I remember that he was tired already when he left the house, that he has a habit of texting while driving...that Stephen's fiance is mad at Kevin and I don't know her well enough to be sure that she wouldn't poisin his soda, that he could be hurt.
The place that my thoughts do not go is the obviouse place. That he may have misled me, that there is someone else. There is enough trust between the two of us that not until I actually typed it out..."He never came home last night" did I think of the common reaction to the situation.
I wish he would have text, or left a voice mail, or updated his status on Facebook or something just so that I would know that he is ok. I am sure that he is. Ok. I just can't keep my imagination in check of him lying in a hospital bed from dozing off at the wheel and driving over the curb and thru someone's living room then flipping the truck over their abnormaly large sofa.
Good God. Kevin. Text me damnit!

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"Let us push for a time when all of this is a non issue."

A friend of mine who writes for the Dallas Examiner wrote that about gay teens in an article tonight and it hit me hard. That is exactly what we need to be fighting for, not gay rights but rights in themselves, for all people gay or straight. Those rights, those freedoms should be ours regardless, they should be a "non issue". The GLBT community should not have to stuggle any more than the home and gardening community when it comes to the rights we all share as Americans, as humans. Each of us should have the right to marry who we want to marry, live where we want to live, work where we want to work, sit where we want to sit, adopt children if we so choose, teach school, lead groups, run for office, live the way we want to live provided that it is not physically harming those around us.

Let us push for a time when all of this is a non issue.
Furthurmore, let us push for a time when one's sexuality does not determin one's personality or cultural experience in this country. Let us push for a time when straight couples and gay couples can ask for advise about their relationships from the same person. Let us push for a time when gay rights are no longer on the political ticket because they are a given, a non issue. Let us push for a time when being gay or straight no longer matters to anyone other than the person you are sleeping with.

Let us push for a time when all of this is a non issue.

Lets.

http://www.examiner.com/x-15437-Dallas-Gay-Relationships-Examiner

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Arthur and I have decided to collaborate on a project combining his photography with my poetry. The idea (initially) is for each of us to come up with 10 topics for the other person who will then take photos/write poetry in relation to said topics. Then Arthur will send me the photos he took and I will write in response to those photos, in turn I will send Arthur the poetry I wrote and he will then take photos to compliment the writings. When we have them all finished we will most likely figure out some intricate way of displaying them together and then Arthur intends to bind them in a hand made book and I plan on building a blog around the entire project.

Arthur of course sent me 18 rather than 10 topics. I believe I am going to (attempt) write about all 18 and then choose 10 of those 18 to include in the project. I origonally sent Arthur only 10 topics (as we had agreed) but I have come up with 8 more so that he will have the same option to choose the 10 he prefers.

The topics Arthur sent to me are as follows:

1.Solitude
2.City Limits
3.Gaze
4.Bright Light
5.Through the Haze
6.In a Nutshell
7.Around the Clock
8.Ocean View
9.Intermittently
10.Putting on Airs
11.Blood, Sweat and Tears
12.Forgotten
13.Residual
14.Magnitude
15.Ritualistic
16.Vehemently
17.Ingrained
18.Searching

The topics I chose for Arthur are below:

1.Spiritual Warfare
2.Somewhere in the City
3.This American Life
4.In Reverse
5.Internal Dialog
6.Underworld
7.The Body is a Temple
8.Fall
9.Success
10.Justice
11.The Messenger
12.Total Loss
13.Zodiac
14.Deus Ex Machina
15.Militant
16.Bliss
17.Communication
18.Chaos


I would be much more confidant in the success of this project, the completion of this project even if I still wrote well enough to warrant a project involving poetry...We'll see how it goes.

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I will stay on top of it this time.
I will blog as often as my dog growls.
Here within I will write about all the big things in my life
and bitch about all the little things, as any blogger should.

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My plans have all been changed and rearranged yet again. The peace corp will be put off much longer than I originally planed...or even what I assumed in the 3rd, 4th and 5th amended plans.
My goals are adjusting, I am incorporating an additional person, making the impossible leap to meld our dreams and aspirations together to form one common mind set for the direction we want to take our lives...together. I am but one part of a we, and we are happy.